Текст песни Future Posse Cut One Thousand (Stig of the Dump) с переводом

I was thinking like we just, all get together, in between now and when we it

out and just all get pissed in Holloway and just like have a cypher in the

booth and just record it and then just like mash up a couple of like,

you know like minute and a half pieces and bits of cyphering, and then that’s

like exclusive freestyle shit cause the kids love that

Yeah yeah yeah. that sounds good

And then that’s, that’s 500 quid

Shit son

Basically, guaranteed no brainer

We could just spend that on strawberry daiquiris and mopeds

Exactly that’s booze money

Ehehe. I’m rentin' a moped. Deff. We’ve got’a get some motorbikes

Shit, the last time I was in a moped I was like «weeewrereeeeeeggghh waaaahhhh»

Yeah, uh, it’s all. It's all distorted.

And its awkward, I stab an orphan with an orchid

And pork sword it, then I feed it to a swordfish

Awesome shit, shaving a pasty

I’m raping David Blaine with an ashtray

He’s like, «Please stop it»

He’s Wallace and she’s Gromitt

Bangin' on the moon, strangle a baboon

Kick him in the fanny then I bang it with a broom

I’m in lesbian prison

Dying on my own, cryin' at the throne

Violent with the bone

Pull the bone off and snap if in half

I’m just havin' a laugh

Are we ready?

Are we ready?

Are we ready?

I’m just havin' a laugh

Are we ready?

R-r-ready

I I I I I-I'm just havin' a laugh

These years are gold years, I won’t ever be rich

Fuck a life I’ma live mine whatever it is

I’ll get in a whip and drive like a hedonist prick

Forgettin' I’m pissed and high not to mention the sniff

I never question what I got in my brain

I’m not afraid, I’m the most honest nov' in the game

With a gob like a drain, I’m obnoxious and lazy

And still gettin' props in a cotch full of ladies, baby

And I ain’t gonna play unless you pay me

And make me a shake eggs bacon or baked beans

Never catchin' feelings actin' weak and all emotional

I simply catch a beat when I’m erratic and I vocal all

Sociable, overly so, but fuck passive

I chat shit loads and you know my tongue’s magic

My drug habit and clothes are both free

Till I come home blagging in this homeless bloke’s jeans

Hi, (Hello) my names Steven (What?)

Would you like a little bit of company this evening? (Uh)

You can bring the wine (Ooh) I’ll get the cheese and (Lovely)

Nah fuck that let’s get absolutely steaming!

Tell the bouncer I’ma bring a gram of weed in

Back stage at a rave with the grave chief’n

Bag a bag of beef till I start to lose the feelin' in my face

Smash the place till we’re hangin' from the ceiling

(Team Hate!) Team Hate, SMB, that’s the link-up

Truck a load but the whole party stink up

There’s a prize at the bottom love, drink up

Fuck the respect, I want the money and my dick sucked

Hawaiian shirt on my back (Splash)

Cool Runnings, rockin' that John Candy swag

In fact what you want is penis

So I tell her that she’s better on top like my team is

Whose that dashing young exec making power moves in the board room

Who told his secretary to never put your calls through? Not me

But picture that level of ignorance

And triple it and I will still be more rude, fuck your crew

I’m like Jaws, you’re more like Jaws 2

Same sorta thing, not as good, poor you (Aww)

I’m like Bishop but with more juice

Unzip my flies then I put them in your soup (Word play)

Word to my potential unborn kids

Rappers forfeit and turn yellow like jaundice

Don’t like my shit? Well horses for courses

But my guess is you’re the sort of prick

Who thinks ballin' would be scorin' with a Geordie Shore chick

During a Majorca trip you probably saw her in The Sport, that cost 40 quid

My name is Dr. Syntax I’m on some awesome shit

But you already knew that didn’t you, of course you did

It’s pannin' out and I ain’t found no gold yet

Find me where the surface is wet but there’s no mould yet

I’m all in and rappers start to fold bets the stage before an old vet

Puttin' holes in circles where the soul left

Blow clefts through smoke rings to test my aim

Don’t play notes just B flat linin' them again

Keep what I C sharp 'cause this world can get insane

Fuck lies, fuck blame, fuck pride, fuck shame

I’m a simple creature, gimme a dame and big sack of reefer

And I’ll smile like my dicks making a mouth deeper, a west of sav speaker

Spring a leak in a steady flow to zone on another bangin' Dike feature

Shit I might teach ya, might not

Might make you spack out and kick a hole in your right speaker

Tryina make this music ugly but beautiful

So kids go «eurgh!», but not the head because it’s musical

So. if you hate my guts you can choke on my balls

And I’ll take a picture of it just to post on your wall

I ain’t blaggin' you up, trust me I’m an arrogant cunt

A savage a drunk fuck and apparently scum

Just because I get my kick out of embarrassing chumps

And taggin' their drums, yeah I’m a vandal for fun

Smokin' fags just to damage my lungs

Screamin' life’s too short while I’m necking neat brandy and rum

I do music for a livin', I ain’t gettin' a job

Who the fuck’s gonna employ a stole veteran slob

That turns up to his midday shift at 7 o’clock

And pisses in the boss’s office while he’s telling him off?

So you can catch me lookin' smashed with a spliff and a beer

Feedin' a fat heffer chicken while I’m lickin' her ear

It’s 5 AM and my mission is clear, I need to bust a fuckin' nut

And there ain’t no other women in here

Aye yo man I hold weight and control these fakes

Eatin' chocolate cake, sippin' a protein shake

Fat face flows, and the track plays through

All these fake little rats in the trap they chose

V to the fucking E to the fucking R to the B

The initial is T, I’m fuckin' large

That’s right, we rock homeless fashion

Might spit into the crowd show no compassion

Fools imaginations are overactive

Oh you’re actin', I’ll burn you and mold the plastic

To a new shape, two face, fuck the fake hype

A new aim too shame struck with snake bite

Venom in the veins, sendin' them insane

Rushin' through the blood, intended for the brain

So you’d do well to remember these damn names

It’s the new faces of the derelict campaign

Screamin' in the face of every screen and peen receiver

Was the Baxstar starkers in the field of steaming ether

Yeah you see him, crack hands mahoosive on a slappin' spree

Slug a slug backward off the Travel Tavern balcony

So how could she watch her personality evaporate

Curdle in the corner and contaminate a tanqueray

With tears, tears, bitter sweet tears

While we’re fuckin' up the jam, with a spliff in each ear

This year, shits getting fucking fucked up

Round 2 acid prawn summer uncut

See the top shelf smut barren plummet untouched

From the sky settle safely in the blood and guts bruv

Well done, recruiting for my rebel terror cell

Selling second hand remains from the day heaven fell

And congealed in the kitchen of every desert hell

Is a mouldy eyed chief in a cracked metal shell let’s move

These are the words that my brain is tellin' me to stick down

On a shitty crumbled ugly fuckin' piece of paper

I was thinking what the fuck he’s goin' on about

But it just told me to shut the fuck up and ignite the flavor

So I listen to the feeble flappin' muscle in my skull

And put the pen back to the sheet until the ink would fit

To be honest everything I’ve ever written in my life has been abysmal

(Why?) 'Cause I’m a stupid heap of shit, I’m such a dick

The most selfish twat you’ll ever meet, trust me

Ask any person that I have ever known

In my entire life and they’ll confirm that Edward Scissortongue

Is hands down the biggest fucking cunt inside the country

Plus I’m fucking stingy, I top load my zoots

And I won’t drive you home to the village to the city

I swear to god that if you look at me again

I’ll shit my pants and start flinging fucking flaming lumps like frisbees

Oi toss pot do you watch whats Top Of The Pops?

Nah, I cotch with Dot Cotton hot boxin the dots

And what, I’m not bothered if apocalypse drops

I’ll be fox trotting bollocks with a bottle of scotch

With god’s comet? Stop waffling 'cause probably not

Shop coffas shop shottas got us watchin' a clock

Scotch bonnet hot molotov off the top

To polyphonic pop sonics, rock proper or what?

I’m on a mission, that isn’t shit to do in spittin' writtens

I’m tryna bring a difference to kids in bitter Britain

If you ain’t got the time to take to listen to the wisdom

Then I ain’t got the time to waste to kill the cynicism

I never had the time of day for givin' it the big 'en

When I spit, I spit it sick for the spirits of inhibition

It’s the Mr. Kizzakizzum with a dirty double D cup

A pair of massive tits keep smugglin' your peanuts

It’s Big Flips the dangler, microphone damager

Goin' through the green like a mutha fuckin' rambler

Head’s spinnin', metaphorical jazz

Still steppin' on the road rockin' nothin' but old rags

Tees I’ve had for years and my jeans that are so sag

Got particles of dust in the wallet but no cash

All the dough I had i done spend it on chro' bags

Mixed it up with pizz until memories fade to black, it’s

Pointless to repent when there’s no way to go back

Like a fetus in a jar after a car crash

Disaster’s a par fact, I’m pavin' them bars of hash

While you’re screwin' at your zoogie complainin' of hard ash

You’re a rookie I’m a lad, look at me I pay in cash

Cause I’m fillin' out this venue the fans are just fuckin' fab

I’m a smash like glass on the concrete when it be dash

Real rapper bring it back, call it zoogie man slide

You can guarantee that Leaf is high

So many clouds in my room it’s like my house is above the sky

No lie that’s my life never lost a love

Son I put it on to beat like a boxer’s glove

Workin' the sub like I’m in the Navy

You know the claps comin' like when the crowd’s goin' crazy

Son of Lee son of Davey

Bring a summary like there’s war comin' lately

That’s how these cunts made me

I don’t feel that hip-hop's represented

The music for the poor stood where the rich sent it

They’re a joke and never been a lyricist

The closest thing to seeing pussy was the mirror images

Don’t take the risk cause you ain’t half as nice

And will remain unknown like the secrets of the after life

In a world trying to search for the answer

A riddle through your mind just like a brain cancer

Ah hahaha haaaaa haaaa haaaaaa